The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize