Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
i barfeds in our rink
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I'm at about main and main street
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
