Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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