Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
ttyl tear gas
Rumble strips road head = magical
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
