Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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