I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
well you can't waste a boner
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
