So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
