Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
