just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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