Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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