That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
