So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize