I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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