new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
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