The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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