I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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