hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
