susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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