He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Still dying that you shit outside
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Randomize
