She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
