wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Let's get the cat blown out
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
