This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
The dick lei will go down in squad history
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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