Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
