just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
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