You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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