thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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