Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
no more duck duck goose at the bar
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize