Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I need to calm my uterus...
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
