he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
His hands were made for my vagina.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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