can we get nightvision for the apartment?
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
