We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
