Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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