My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize