Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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