Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
