Did you just see the Batmobile???
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
