is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
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