I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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