Why are handjobs necessary in class?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
My vagina just recognized that song.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
