my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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