How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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