How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
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