Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
