Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
