Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
