but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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