i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Randomize
