i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
