I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Randomize
