There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
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Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
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Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
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